Manifesting is Tricky Business

Cristina Acosta feather duster
This feather duster has been with me since the mid 1990s when it manifested.

“As artists, we are manifesting thought into reality every time we create. Applying those same skills to the self is a natural transition.” Years ago, I said that. Thanks to Art-quotes.com, I can now remember that I said that! And, I can look at the words that came out of my mouth over fifteen years ago and reconsider that wisdom.

Manifesting is tricky business. At times, I’ve acted as though the process was a giant vending machine floating around the universe — put in the proper currency (affirmations, actions, positivity) and out would pop my latest desire or answer to my prayer. Sometimes, that seemed to have been true. I have had some wonderful manifestations, and some very odd things. The little odd things are so odd yet seemingly so coincidental, that I’m perplexed when much more important and sought after desires haven’t manifested. And conversely, some tough things I’ve never seen coming have manifested.

For example, years ago I was looking at my Bend, Oregon, gallery, covered in dust and pollen after a particularly potent spring wind had blown through, and realized that I needed a feather duster. I envisioned the huge ostrich-feather type of duster Mary Poppins would have pulled from her bag. Driving downtown that afternoon I saw that exact feather duster laying in the middle of the street in front of the fire department. At that moment a tall handsome man in a fire department uniform was walking across the street, a few letters in hand. I pulled over (my then pre-school age daughter was in her car seat) and asked the man if he could please pick up that feather duster for me. He laughed when I told him that I had just been thinking of one and he graciously handed it to me through my car window. I still have that duster because I’m still perplexed as to why I have it – in the metaphysical sense.

Why, considering all of the lush successes and dry, hard challenges I’ve had since then, has that feather duster manifested when career goals, personal goals, book proposals and exhibit opportunities have not panned out as expected? Even the occasional lottery ticket has gone to the recycle bin without any stops at the bank along the way. What the heck?!

My 20+ year marriage ended, my life changed in unforeseen ways that cracked apart huge continents on the planet that is my world view and still I carry around that feather duster.

It reminds me that manifesting is a reality, but that the course my tiny, insignificant, immensely precious self takes spinning in dark immense space with billions of other ephemeral beings on a fragile planet is not a course under my complete control. God has given me the opportunity to choose my dreams and visions and the energy to manifest them. What happens next are the small, medium and large miracles that make up my life.